I'll let this conversation speak for me.

HOLY SHIT I AM A TELEPATH.
ahem
Andrea: lol what just happened?
me: sorry.
okay in this post:
http://blog.johannkwan.com/archives/2005/10/thanksgiving.html
it's before I go home for Thanksgiving
and several days later, I make a post about how when I was home there were creepy homeless dudes dancing to Guantanamera
after just including that last line in my post a few days ago
Andrea: hahahahahah
me: I didn't even make that connection till now.
Andrea: so this, plus strange-connection-with-ex.....
you've got something going on, Johann!
me: see... here! http://blog.johannkwan.com/archives/2005/10/sidenotes.html

So we arrived in Xi'an in the morning, and dropped off our bags at the hotel before setting off into town. Before I get into anything else... since I'm writing this days later and am soon to leave Xi'an, I'm gonna do a quick rundown of the hotels thus far.

Doubletree by Hilton Beijing
Pros:
Great decor
Great service
Good food
Well stocked bar selection
Cheap (comparitively)

Cons:
Location is outside the second ring road, which isn't super far, but it's far enough to be mildly inconvenient.

Golden Flower Hotel by Shangri-La, Xi'an
Pros:
Decent, I suppose, but not exceptional in any way.
Free internet in the rooms, rather than just in public areas
Lavender scented soap, shampoo, and conditioner

Cons:
Sub-par service
Had to switch rooms right when we got here cause our room smelled like urine
Older building
Way too many tour-groups
Undercooked food
Technically a five-star hotel, but undeserving of it (by contrast Doubletree Beijing is four-star, and deserves every bit of it and more)

Anyway, after switching rooms cause the smell was unbearable, we set off into town and had a dumpling lunch, followed by a walk throught the old muslim district (now covered with cheap stands with knock-off watches and purses in what is somehow called an antique market) where I bought a couple tee shirts and a revolutionary medal I believe is one of the few genuinely antique things in the market.

Walking through the old muslim district we stumbled across what I had been secretly hoping we'd be going to in Xi'an, the Great Mosque. One of the earliest and most revered mosques in China, it is unique in the sense that the architecture is distinctly Chinese, and were it not from choice Quranic passages in the stonework, you would never identify the building ass a mosque.

I took some photos of an old guy singing, who happened to be the groundskeeper who'd lived there his whole life and who had interesting stories to tell (which I got translated through my mother) and stuck around long enough to hear the afternoon adhan (am I spelling/remembering that right?) and watched people filter into the prayer room (and out of it).

After the mosque we walked up the drum tower, and also checked out a small chinese drum show. I also bought a Xun, a small terracotta wind instrument. It is awesome.

When we got hungry we decided to try a local dish we'd heard about called Pao Mo, which confused the hell out of me. It's supposed to be a lamb or goat soup, or at least so I heard, but they gave us two really hard pieces of flatbread in a bowl... which after much consternation and looking about we finally figured out we were supposed to tear into tiny bits before they poured soup into it and made the bread edible. There's an interesting legend behind it I'll recount perhaps another time, but I figured it's an old traditional dish to essentially make old bread edible.

It was, however, super delicious.

Xian: Day 2
16.05.2010

Day 2 was basically spent checking out the terracotta warriors. What more can be said about them than has already been said? They're breathtaking. The parents got a tour guide though, and that was possibly the most uselessly pointless thing ever. Having a loudmouth explain history I'd heard plenty of times on Discovery disturbing what would otherwise be a sublime experience was obnoxious.

After that we checked out the Winter Palace / Hot Springs nearby but it was rainy, and there really wasn't much to see.

For some reason, dinner was had at some sort of dinner show place with dancing and such which was a collection of stories of the Tang Dynasty. The food was subpar and the show was only middlin' decent, aside from this dude who could make bird sounds with his voice. Which was awesome.

Spose that kinda sums it up... going to check out the terracotta soldiers was pretty much the highlight.

Xian: Day 3
17.05.2010

We started Day 3 with a visit to this Tang Paradise theme park which was supposed to be modeled after the Dynasty and such. Snoooooze. Fortunately we were all bored and it was cheap, so we left and hit up teh city wall. While my parents and the brother got rickshaw rides on the wall, I rented a bike for 20Y and biked up and down the wall, snapping photos... that was pretty much the best thing I'd done in a long while. Getting some time away from the family whilst on this vacation, while it's been pretty sweet so far, was something I really, really needed. That pretty much sums up the day, really, besides hunting around for a while for food and hiding from the rain in a superstore.

Xian: Day 4

Day 4 wasn't spent doing much but riding to Mount Hua for three hours, climbing it, and riding back. I suppose I'll sum up the ride thus: What. Le. Fuck. Chinese traffic be nuts. I mean like three cars in a single lane (one hanging on the shoulder, one kinda in the other lane, one in the centre) kinda nuts. Other than that, it was nice to get a glimpse of Chinese farming communities (lots of people selling strawberries by the road... I suppose they're in season?) and such. There were a LOT of people selling water from hoses by the road, presumably for truck radiators. I suppose overheating is an issue.

Mount Hua was awesome. Obviously famous for its ties to Martial Arts in China, it stands 2160m from sea level. And I climbed it all... from where the cable car drops you off, anyway. =D Consider it a base-camp of sorts. The parents, of course, did not make it all the way up, but my brother and I pushed on.

One major suggestion to anyone who plans to go: DO NOT hire a tour guide like my parents seem to like doing. I think she wanted to help her friend up at the top, where we're supposed to climb (harnessed in) across a cliff that has some grooves cut into it and chains for support (shifting carabiners across one by one so we don't fall to our deaths)... so she told us we weren't allowed our cameras on the climb. Which was a load of shit since everyone else had their cameras, so we had to buy a bunch of shitty polaroids of us climbing before we reached the shrine at the end.

Nonetheless, hanging on a sheer cliff, looking down at least a kilometer (more, probably) down to the bottom of a valley with nothing to stop you from falling but a worn-looking harness and some carabiners is pretty exhilarating. The view was breathtaking. I just wish I had goddamn photos. Grar. (though I got some from where we started the climb, it's just not the same).

The walk down was considerably easier than the walk up (obviously), and by the time we got back to the hotel it was past 9 and I was worn out, so we just had a (shitty) hotel dinner and hit the hay... early flight and all back to Beijing the next day.

A note: As I write about Beijing: Part Deux, I'm sitting in the plane to Hong Kong, listening to Iron & Wine, nestled safely in Sam Beam's musical beard. I didn't change the loadout on my iPod before I set off, and it's been a bit weird, since most of the stuff on here is soft indie/Canadiana to get me through essays and such. So... Luke Doucet as I climb the Great Wall, Leonard Cohen while I wait out the rain, etc. Then there are the few artists I have on here with a real beat... I biked the city walls in Xi'an to Gogol Bordello, for instance.

Beijing: Part Deux: Day 1

Nothing to report. Flight, waiting forever at the airport for a ride, finally catching one, booking in the hotel and getting dinner out with Uncle Greg and other family. A note, however, on service in China. It's awesome. I know of nowhere else in the world where you can get a free shoeshine while you wait for a table at a restaurant. Which I badly needed, since while I'm accustomed to shining my shoes once a month or so, I haven't been able to do so here and it's mighty dusty in Beijing and Xi'an. Hell, even the customs officers have little machines which you can push buttons on to rate their performance, whether it was satisfactory or TOO SLOW. It's wild.

Stayed at the Swissotel this time around... which for some reason, in addition to swiss and Chinese flags out front, also flies a Canadian one. Not sure why, and never did find out. OOC: ... oAnd a flight attendant's behind just full on pressed up into my face. (People are still boarding, but that was a little bit of a "hmmpffgh now I need to wipe my glasses off" kinda moment)

Anyway, that really was essentially all we did Day 1 back in Beijing. Most of it was spent in airports. Can't be helped, I spose.

Beijing: Part Deux: Day 2

Hmm. I just realized up until now I've completely neglected to mention Tom. Tom is my second cousin. He's Australian, and works with Greg. He also offered to take my brother and I out to show us around, which was a very welcome change of pace... so we met him at his office and set off for Nan Lo Gou Xiang, a cool little old street redone as a shopping and bar area, and walked from there past the drum tower to Hou Hang and chilled there with a couple Tsing Taos on the bridge, waiting with other photographers for the sunset. Course, they all had better gear than me (how, I don't know, it's not as though my gear comes cheap) and roped in some girl off the street to pose for them. Lecherous old dudes. Gotta remember not to end up being one of those super lecherous photographers who use their hobby to try and get girls.

We also met up with Tom's friend Amy, with whom, in his words, he is 'smitten with'. She's Chinese but grew up in Finland, likes drinking scotch and is generally from the bit of time we spent chillin a cool person... so two thumbs up there. Especially the bit about the scotch. =)

After the sun went down we strolled around a bit, waited for the lanterns to come on and for it to light up before we set back off over to Nan Lo Gou Xiang for a couple beers at their friends' bar, which was a neat little place called Bye Bye Disco. I'll leave it up to my photos (when I get back) to demonstrate what it was like. Food followed, and a really really sketchy 'cab' ride. Fuck that guy. Tried to bilk us and charge 28 RMB for the ride back to the hotel, when it's clearly not that expensive. So we yelled at him and he shut the fuck up and didn't say a word. Fuck. That. Guy.

Few things to note when visiting Nan Lo Gou Xiang... I will post a picture later of this awesome yogurt place that Tom took us to. If you're ever in Beijing, I highly recommend going there. Also... food there is tasty, if a bit sketch. David had a bit of a sore stomach the next day (though I was fine). You are warned... but hopefully not dissuaded.

Beijing: Part Deux: Day 3

Not much to say here, I suppose. Finally went down to see Tiananmen Square (well, walk it, anyway. I'd seen it from the road plenty of times), and such. The State Museum was closed for renovations... so I didn't really spent all that much time there in the area. It's kinda depressing, they've put these two gigantic TV screens there now which kinda blocks the view quite a bit. And, now that I'm in a plane OVER China I can say that without protesting students there it's just a big public space bounded on all sides by very imposing buildings (such as Mao's Mausoleum). Le mehs.

Dinner, however, since it was to be the last in Beijing, was fabulous. We found this kinda upscale yuppie-ish place, but with really reasonable prices (maybe because it's nestled among more famous restaurants, one of which I'd been to already on the trip and was moderately satisfied with). It's called the Peony Pavillion and is located within the old building of the Imperial Granary... it's pretty much the best place to we got duck at in the city. Flippin delicious. Also... it has a record store attached to it, and several really high-end audio rooms with really really nice audio equipment and very comfortable seating in which you can listen to records you buy at the store. Which is exactly what we did while they prepped the duck (freshly prepped, so preptime was about 45 minutes). Super, super relaxed time, and the food was possibly the best I'd had all trip. The duck was, for sure. Not too fatty, roasted to perfection... om nom nom nom nom nom. (The entire meal was, I think, 420 RMB for the four of us... which comes down to like a bit under $80 CDN/US)

So good.

Off to Hong Kong now... I'm not sure if I'll keep up the triplog there. It's pretty much all gonna be family time... and Hong Kong's nothing new to me. Though things might happen... and it'll be the first time in a long time I'll actually get to catch up with some of my cousins, so good times might ensue. We'll see. I'm sure the father and the brother are boarding or have boarded by now on their flight back to Canada.

I'm gonna make this short and condense the last couple days into a quick blurb, since not all that much happened. Spent almost all of day 6 at the Summer Palace. I insisted we stay by a little pagoda by the lake till the sun set instead of heading back, and got some amazing photos as the the sun went down. Can't wait to get back to my computer and process them.

Going to the summer palace is a lot like going to Versailles. Neat, but not a lot to write about. And lots of tourists in the areas with buildings, not so many in the gardens.

Day 7 was spent mostly sitting around doing nothing, so... not much to write about. Cept that northern Chinese girls are way more attractive than you might find in the south, for some reason. I mean, I'm generalizing, but it appears to be true.

Oh, I suppose we did spent some time in a mall after dinner. Watched a little girls' figure skating class for a while whilst my mum shopped. Not as impressive as the kung-fu practice, but it was a reminder of where I was and to what extent kids (or their parents, rather) are way more overachieving than the government could ever push them to be.

Off to Xi'an soon, should sleep so I can wake early enough for the 2 hour ride to the airport. Blurrrrrgh.

As mentioned before, Day 4's agenda pretty was pretty much just the Great Wall. We spent a lot of the day, however, on the tour bus picking people up from other hotels (14 people in total on the trip) before setting off on the 1hr 30min trip off to the Great Wall section at Mutainyu. This afforded me a lot of time to further observe street life in Beijing. I've mentioned the traffic before, but I rather expected a lot more bicycles... but as the lady on the tour from Amsterdam noted, there are a lot more bikes in most European cities. Everyone here seems to be 'upgrading' to automobiles to fulfill their life-goals... and as such traffic is ridiculous. I'll post a photo later of a typical Beijing junction, with cars turning left, going forward, etc in all four directions.

The route to the Great Wall was really pretty, with a lot of new developments, mixed with older buildings. Seems like along the route they definitely want to take down the old and bring in the new. I'm not certain how common this is otherwise, but there was a lot of construction going on of both some really nice apartments and new lower-income housing.

Oh yeah, and some sheep. And Toilet's. With an apostrophe. Don't ask me what the possessive is there for, I'm not entirely sure.

There's not much to say about the Great Wall... it's the Great Wall. I'm glad we went to Mutainyu instead of Badaling, since there weren't a lot of people. A quick ski-lift trip up to the wall from the base of the mountain, hang a right and up a very uphill section of the wall (we could've gone left, but right was more challenging and led to a dilapidated section that was marked an end-point to turn around at). Not much to make not of besides the people on the wall selling water and other beverages... they must have to hoof their wares up the wall every day. Which means that while I might get a little winded climbing up the steps while carrying a load of camera gear, a bunch of little old ladies and little old men are carrying a far heavier load daily. Oof.

I'll skip the ride back, there wasn't much to see. But they took courtesy of the Chinese government to attend a little presentation on Chinese herbal medicine and, more importantly, get a foot massage. Despite having to sit through a bit of stuff aimed at white people to promote Chinese herbal medicine for preventative care and stuff like that (I have ginseng tea and other wonderful things at home), the foot massage was so worth it after that walk.

We asked the driver not to take us back to the hotel but to drop us off somewhere we could find food after dropping most of the other passengers off, since it was rush hour and our hotel was a bit past the 2nd ring road (and therefore would take forever to get to) and so we ended up in the shopping area. We found some hot pot in the mall, which was nice, and though we meant to leave and call it a night, I spotted the night market, so we had to go and check it out and shoot some sweet photos.

Highlight of the market: Some guy summoning up enough chutzpah (that I will never have... I nixed insects and crawly arachnids off my 'to eat' list a long time ago) to try scorpion. And the girl who he passed it to who tried it as well. While it apparently tastes like chicken, you won't see me going near it, ever. (nor the locals)

Besides the usual stinky tofu, strange bits of meat, and other such fun bits, the real tourist trap items included things like scorpions, centipedes, sheep's penis, undersea mushrooms (which glowed), starfishes, long-horn beetles (which, if I'm not incorrect, poses a major threat to Canadian trees or something?), silk worm cocoons, etc. Some of the stuff seemed strange, but I totally would've eaten (had I not already been quite full from hot pot) like sea urchin, which yields up delicious Uni.

I have it on decent authority (someone who tried it) that starfish is not appetizing.

Not much else can be said about the night, we headed back and hit the sack.

A note, however, on public transportation here. It's cheap. Like 2 RMB for the subway, 1 RMB for the bus kinda cheap. And the buses, once they get within the city core, have a device strapped to the top of the bus that they raise upwards to connect to an electric grid so that it then operates much like a tramway without rails. It's pretty ingenious.

Beijing: Day 5
13.05.2010

I've eaten more breakfast in the last few days than possibly in my entire university career. Since it's free and all and I've actually been waking up at times that demand breakfast rather than having a big brunch. Enough about that, though.

Headed out down into town to check out an older part of town (though, one that had been dressed up for tourists... the real thing right downstairs, which I'll have to walk more around in. But travelling with the mother has a very... touristy quality to it). I'll let the photos speak for themselves here. We took a bit of a bike-rickshaw tour, saw a bunch of wedding photos (I've seen like... 10 shoots going on now throughout the trip... we keep hitting up touristy areas where it's pretty, I suppose, and it *is* a city of 20 million people), and then proceeded after the tour on foot.

While it's been dolled up in parts people do actually still live there, and cutting through the alleys does lead further into it. Course, it would be impolite to just waltz into a family's (or a bunch of families') courtyard, though I really wanted to.

Lunch was Peking Duck again. We had it before we went and walked through the village, really, so I'm a little out of order. We're in Beijing, so obviously, Peking Duck needs be done. It was supposedly one of the most famous places to get duck (or at least, famous chains) and it was delicious. On the way to the bathroom, though, I got a glimpse of something a million times more awesome. Since the restaurant was in the basement of the bar/shopping area it shared a bathroom with things around it, and there were a couple big gyms down there. One had some teenage boys boxing in a ring, which was less cool, but the other had a bunch of kids practicing kung-fu. I mean full on kung fu... these kids did stuff with swords and spinning kicks in mid-air that were just bloody impressive. I didn't have my camera on the way to the bathroom, but we had my brother's little point-and-shoot Lumix, so I've a few crappier photos. Like my brother said though, "Now we know not to get into any fights here, a six year old could kick our ass."

It was pretty friggin epic. I kept talking about it as we walked through the village.

Other than that, we didn't do much... took it kinda easy so we could get a bit of downtime and not wear ourselves out this early in the trip. We headed back to the hotel, had tons of free food and booze, and eventually went back to the room to pass out.

I suppose there's not much to say about Day 3. Woke up, had an early breakfast and stuffed myself before setting off to the Temple of Heaven, where the Emperor did his worshipping. It was interesting enough, but besides a bunch of temple buildings and expansive gardens, the attraction itself really didn't have much by way of grabbing me. On the other hand, elderly folk in the area gather in the covered garden walkways of the temple to do stuff, so I got to listen to some old guy practice his... (uh, damn, I forgot the name of the one-string stringed instrument with a drum at the bottom... help, Timmmmm!) and watch some sort of old people's dancing club. They had tossed all their stuff into a pile cept their clothes, so... handbags, etc. and propped up an amp... blasting techno, of all things, and rocked out dancing. Other than that, there were also a few card games going on, and people just sitting about chatting.

Much of the early afternoon was spent hunting for food. Immediately next to the temple was a rather famous indoor market... where I could've gotten cheap clothes and stuff for people back home, but knowing that I could do the same in Hong Kong and actually have enough Cantonese to haggle (rather than my absolutely useless grasp of Mandarin besides "Wo shi ei goh jung goh ren" which I still remember (and apparently pronounce with a pretty pure accent) from elementary school, I didn't really bother. The mother wanted to stop in the basement of that building to get some fast food Yoshinoya stuff (since we didn't see much else) but that was dumb, so I got everyone moving and we walked a couple blocks to find a place that did Peking Duck. Which was delicious, and just as cheap. Cept for the really loud dude who kept yelling into his phone in the corner and making every other diner kinda uncomfortable.

This was followed by a taxi ride down to the Chaoyang district (where all the shiney new buildings are) to visit Uncle Greg's office for his wine importing business, which was pretty sweet.

By the time we left there it must've been around 4ish... so we got back to the hotel through the traffic and everything back in time for the free happy hour, had plenty of free hors d'oeurvres and beer, and then got a massage (well, at least my mum, brother, and I did, dad opted out). I've been talking about finding a decent massage parlour in Ottawa all year, but it took getting here before finally acting on it. I could feel years of built up essay stress escape my back and shoulders.

That about did it though for the night. Even though it was around 8-9ish, I took the oppurtunity to hit the sack whilst in that supreme state of relaxation... and consequently woke around 5AM this morning (in time for the sunrise). Great Wall soon, gotta get breakfast and get ready to go.

The flight into Beijing, being 13 hours, was less than interesting. I whiled away the time by watching 4-5 episodes of Dexter, The Young Victoria, and The Book of Eli... sleep was difficult, as there was a child behind me and he spent most of the flight kicking my chair or doing such other things, something his parents seemed to refuse to remedy despite my turning around and glaring at the boy whenever there was a particularly forceful kick. I hate children. I hate shitty parents more, I suppose.

Landing at around 4PM, we were greeted by Uncle Gregory, mum's cousin, who is in Beijing at the moment at his office here. He imports wine into China... not sure if it's exclusively from Australia (where he used to live) or if it's from elsewhere as well, but his hospitality has been no less than amazing. He had hired a car for us to take us to the hotel and then to dinner, which he had booked for 6PM...

Before I continue, a word on the driver, and driving in Beijing in general. The way I heard it over dinner, he was one of the drivers Uncle Greg hired regularly from some firm, but definitely the slower of the two. By slow, I mean kinda slow-witted and 40 in a 70 zone kinda slow. But he's a nice dude and he gets you there, so whatever. Driving in Beijing is a melee... red lights seem to get ignored all the time, the shoulder (marked as emergency vehicles only even on overhead gantries) is just another lane, and I saw maybe two people use their turn signals the entire day.

Due three parts to traffic and one part to our dim-but-nice driver, we didn't make it to the hotel until past 7 and to dinner till nearly 8. Whoops. Driving to the hotel was an adventure in itself though. I braced myself for disappointment as we drove in the first hour or so by a lot of hotels in the commercial district... I really had no desire to see the commercial district cept as an anecdotal contrast. It's all very shiny and new, having sprung up only within the last few years, and is entirely similar to commercial districts elsewhere. However, as we drove further out towards a smog-obscured sun we saw older buildings and communities, many dilapidated, and I could breathe a bit easier. The hotel's the DoubleTree here, which is quite new, apparently, and very well appointed (photos to come). It's in a residential/industrial area... which I'm stoked to go out and shoot photos of.

Dinner was fancy-Chinese... food served sometimes on slabs of slate, etc. And of course, one of the first things we had to do in Beijing was eat Peking Duck. De-friggin-licious.

After dinner we went to a wine and cigar bar which, as far as I can tell, Uncle Greg supplies the wine to. It's an interesting sight seeing little tiny bits of taste filter into the Chinese consciousness... there are not, as far as I can gather, many such places, but they are growing, and the Chinese, with new money to spend, are learning to appreciate fine wines and cigars, all that jazz. For my part, I had a blast. I didn't get a chance to take a look at the labels of the bottles we drank, but they were delicious, and I partook in a wonderful Romeo y Julieta stubby, and struck up conversation with Sonia, Greg's girlfriend (who I have neglected to mention until now). Sonia's a nice girl... 25, with English far better than my (extremely) limited Mandarin. Possibly better than my Cantonese, for that matter. Guess I don't have much to say about her yet... she seems really nice and intelligent, and I suppose that's about it for now.

Night ends there really. A slow ride back to the hotel in the rain, shower, and sleep.

Beijing, Day 2
09.05.2010

Day 2 began slowly, with a huge breakfast in the executive lounge here at the hotel. Had a loooot of food, and quite a bit of dragonfruit. Yum. That was followed by a proper exploration of the hotel's facilities, which led to a 30 minute cardio workout on the stairmaster, and then dim sum in the hotel's restaurant before we headed out. A lot of hotel time... which I don't intend to repeat, but it was nice to get at least one morning of it in, take it slow. We intended to go to the Summer Palace today, but as we apparently got nice-but-dim to take us again instead of taking the subway (I have no idea why) we ended up at the Forbidden City. I suppose he's new into town as well, since he's from the boonies and all, but uh, what?

That kind of left a lot less time for the Forbidden City as I would like, since we kinda had to rush through the whole palace in about 2 hours before it closed. Hopefully, today the parental units will finally take my advice and take public transit.

Notes about the Forbidden City: I am renaming the emperor of China "the dude of a thousand thrones". The layout from layer to layer of the palace was pretty similar. Courtyard, emperor's dragon road leading through it, throne or royal couch, next layer. Also, the moat is huge. Properly huge.

That was followed by a walk around the palace to get back to the car, then straight to Uncle Greg's for dinner. Sonia and her mother made homemade dumplings, which was amazing... it was a very nice little Chinese family dinner, which I hadn't had in a while and quite throughly enjoyed.

Also, I learned that I am related to Bruce Lee through my mum's side. He's my great-grandfather's brother's ... grandson? Something like that. It essentially branches off four generations ago. This is the awesomest thing I've learned about my family... well... ever. I'm friggin related to BRUCE LEE. YESSSSS.

I suppose the day's events and the jet lag kicked in after dinner, cause I totally fell asleep on their super comfortable (and super pink) couch. The night kinda ended there for me... after the parentals did their catching up we came back to the hotel, where I proceeded to go straight to bed. Day 3 needs to begin now... I woke up at 6AM since I got to bed so early, and it's 7AM, so I'm anxious to get going, though I know the subway will be packed at this time of day.

So I suppose I'll go get a huge free breakfast first and see where that takes me.

P.S. If you're reading this on my Facebook feed and expect a response, leave your e-mail address or e-mail me since I can't get onto Facebook while I am in China.

It'd be nice. I have had my stomach knotted in a ball of acidic hell all day. The stress... and the absolute loathing I have for someone right now... it's not nice. That acid-reflux that only shows up when my mood is out of balance usually keeps me pretty level, but when I'm not... life is literally suffering from moment to moment. Nosebleeds, stomach pangs, terrible, terrible nausea.

Thinking about Paris is bringing back a sense of calm. Or Scotland... lying in a park, reading a book, letting it rain every so often on me and enjoying the sunshine inbetween.

I need more than anything now a sense of peace. I need to get my mind away from the dark thoughts that have occupied my mind all day today.

That's enough of whiney ol' me. Sorry I haven't been around much lately... been busy with school. And life. Lots of photography I should probably put up sometime as well.

So tired now. Had a really great time though throughout, so it was totally worth it. Sitting down now with a slow glass of scotch, just letting myself get mellow before the evening ends for me.

Listening to Simon & Garfunkel. Mmm mmm.

Now to clean and get ready to go home for the holidays, woot.

- Francois Rabelais, Gargantua

I'd like to say first of all that it's a good film. I'm not sure how it would ring with your average audience, but being familiar with the subject matter it was... for the most part, quite excellent.

I'm not sure what it says about me that I am so equipped to penetrate the mindset of these terrorists. For years in my... perhaps stupider... youth, I'd almost count myself amongst those willing to fight to the death for the cause. Nietzsche was not wrong to place his hope against the inevitability of the Last Man in Youth.

And perhaps that's the best way, and certainly the way in which my mind has for the last few years characterized the struggle of not just the RAF, but Terrorism in general. It's something I'm still building on since my (wholly inadequate) essay of last semester.

Without spoiling too much, as the film almost treats it as a minor event (focusing more on the lives of the RAF itself)... perhaps in a way Mogadishu didn't only spell the beginning of the end for European continental terrorism but the end of the hope of Youth. Perhaps... okay, not an end, but as an indicator that perhaps force of will alone will not change the inevitable.

I remain confident in my belief that terrorism is the inevitable counteraction that is necessary to diminish (and replenish) the Standing Reserve. Perhaps therein lies the problem inherent in terrorism itself. It is nothing more than another cog in the machine, the other face of the same coin. Violence and brutality does nothing to extricate one from the bind of the modern project.

I'll have to mull it over some more. I have a ton of homework to do (most of it for German class)...

One other thing: I'm impressed they managed to get talented actors who looked like the members of the RAF. Even the actor who played Rudi Dutschke, who plays a bit part in the whole movie... looked like Rudi Dutschke.

It's probably indicative of the fact that I studied Hegel through the lens of Kojeve that I view such characters as inevitable products of society.

That is not to say that there isn't a tinge of disgust and a taste of bile when thinking about it. The axiom that "absolute power corrupts absolutely" is a vile fallacy that has almost become an excuse to simply avoid having to explain the faults of others. It is a historical fact that many power elites knew full well the responsibility that lay upon their shoulders. The lesson to be drawn from Hegel and Nietzsche, even if Nietzsche seems at times to prefer the Master to the Slave, is that with authority there must exist an equal share of responsibility. (Yes, I'm aware that this sounds a lot like Spider-Man)

Yet the idea that power itself imbues actions with moral rightness is something that has always been prevalent amongst elites. A way for them to justify to themselves their darkest thoughts, perhaps. Yet I cannot imagine that their lives could be anything but an existential nightmare straight out of the pages of Brett Easton Ellis, anesthetized with Zoloft and a healthy helping of Ketel One.

There's a thought... if we took the emotional crutches away from the rich and powerful, would they finally wake up to their own nightmares?

I am not saying that wealth and power are in themselves evil. (In fact, Nietzsche would build a time machine to kick me in the face if I claimed so) It has been quite a long time since I have been that ardent a socialist. But they must be coupled with responsibility.

And now I'm also beginning to sound like Heinlein. I think that's my cue to stop dicking about in my head whilst doing chores and buckle down on an essay. Time for a return to Plato and Aristotle.

Until then, enjoy this photo. I took it last month over Thanksgiving.

It might appear that I dine on oysters every night and live a life of profound excess the way I talk about good food all the time... and while the idea I could possibly afford to do so is kind of nice... it really isn't the case. More often than not, I go out for cheap asian food or I make food at home or... most often... when I'm lazy as I am right now, eat something that requires minimal preparation time (but is delicious and healthy).

Right now I'm just eating a baguette I bought locally ($2.25), some organic cherry tomatoes ($3.25) and I should have enough left over from it to get another meal, if not two, from it. The bread I'm just dipping in a mix of equal parts olive oil (spiced) and balsamic vinegar I had kicking around the pantry.

It's a simple, cheap lunch, it's bloody delicious, and it fills you up for the day. There's never any good reason to eat poorly. And sometimes... of course, when I can afford to, there's no reason not to skip over and buy a dozen oysters for the night, shuck them, and have them for dinner. =)

That's all I wanted to say.